Dear Soapy Maven Goddess · Market Maniac

Dear Soapy Maven Goddess

what you really should make is….

Dear Soapy Maven Goddess:

Do you ever get mad when you are at a farmer’s market showing your wares and some stranger will come up to you and tell you what you really should make instead of what you have been doing? In the meantime, all THEY are doing is wandering through a farmer’s market looking at stuff and eating 5000 calorie cinnamon buns dripping with icing while we entrepreneurs are most likely- besides working at other jobs are also creating lovely art or craft on the side to help pay our bills. It just makes me fume that people feel the need to advise a crafter on what else they should be doing in their non-existent spare time. What should I do? Is there anything I can say to make them realize that unwanted advice is not a virtue?

Signed

A Fuming Artisan

Dear FA:

Yes, I do know what you are talking about. I have encountered this phenomenon too many times to mention. And while I almost always am gracious and thank people for their kind suggestions, sometimes I do want to pop them one, right in the kisser. Especially when the encounter goes something like this- ” Excuse me, but what kinds of soaps do you have? I will take about five minutes explaining the forty or so different kinds of soaps that I made in between growing a vegetable garden and cooking all my families meals from scratch and working another job, while always coming up with something new and exciting.  They often overlook the vast array of wares that has taken me years to perfect- and they almost always say with pouty lips, “OH you don’t’ make such and such? ” It is certainly frustrating. But I think it is just a way that those non-creative types have at getting back at us. They are trying to annoy crafters by wasting our precious time and not really wanting to buy something from us because they are saving up for their cinnamon bun/chocolate scone addiction.

It is certainly something to fume about. The only advice I can give you dear Fuming Artisan is to shake it off.  Maybe have a secret sign with another artisan, like pretend something just bit you in the bottom—slap your behind and scream ahhhh! alerting your fellow crafter across the way of what is occurring so that they are ready for this annoying person. Then maybe they can put up a be back in a few minutes sign while they come over to talk. Now you can share a scone and laugh together, while this annoying person passes on by. They are probably on their way to the cinnamon bun vendor to ask them why they don’t make carrot cake.

Love always,

The Soapy Maven Goddess.

cinnamon bun at Blenz on Denman

Photo by link below-

https://www.flickr.com/people/20324540@N00

 

 

 

Dear Soapy Maven Goddess

Dear Soapy Maven Goddess

Dear Soapy Maven Goddess:

Sometimes I can’t help myself. Sometimes, even though I know that I shouldn’t– I still do.

I am so ashamed to admit this, but I- scrape- the- bottom- of -my- soap pot.

I have been soaping for years and should know better. But my background of being raised by a thrift shop clothing buyer mother and second-hand furniture redoer has made me feel bad for wasting the delicious looking but most likely not as good soap stuff from the sides of my soap batch.

Do you ever feel inclined to do this? How can I hold myself back?

Signed-

Making Soap Naked and Ashamed of Myself.

Dear MSNAA of Yourself:

Yes. I know what you mean. This is a great temptation for me as well. Even though we are taught not to scrape the sides of the pot we still wish to do so. It does seem wasteful to just wash it away into your septic field.

And so here is my advice.

Do you have any little interesting soap molds kicking around? You know the ones that I mean, the ones your grandmother’s friends inevitably pick up for you when they are at garage sales and always think of you. They are in the shapes of angels and maybe dog bones. You don’t want to appear rude so you always accept them and then move them around with you for years in a cardboard box on the off chance that one day you will actually get a commission for a slew of dog bone shaped soap. But you never do. Until now. What I am telling you is to scrape that soap from the sides of your pot and pour into these ugly little dog bone shaped molds or the ones in the shape of alien heads. Once they are cured you can use these as air fresheners for your car, closet or underwear drawer. That way you are not wasting soap. This way your nice soap doesn’t get the yucky white ashy stuff in it that sometimes occurs from the unstirred soap from the sides of the pot and you get these little cute air fresheners. It’s a win-win situation.

And about soap making naked. I would definitely wear an apron. Being splashed by raw soap is really no fun. Not that I am admitting to anything. But be safe.

You can dance naked after your pour.

Love always,

The Soapy Maven Goddess

Here is one of my favourite dance naked after soap making songs.

Rosemary Clooney – Come On-A My House amazing song- learn the lyrics and sing along…
click below

https://www.youtube.com/watch?v=mriXncI96lw

Here are the lyrics to help you along if you do not already know them!

Come on-a my house, my house
I’m gonna give you candy
Come on-a my house, my house
I’m gonna give you apple and plum
And an apricot too

Come on-a my house
My house a come on
Come on-a my house
My house a come on

Come on-a my house, my house
I’m gonna give you candy
Come on-a my house, my house
I’m gonna give you everything

Come on to my house, my house
I’m gonna give you Christmas tree
Come on, come on, come on to my house
I’m gonna give you a pomegranate

Come on-a my house
My house a come on
Come on-a my house
My house a come on

Come on-a my house, my house
I’m gonna give you peach and pair
And I love your hair

Come on-a my house
My house a come on
Come on-a my house
My house a come on

Come on-a my house, my house
I’m gonna give you candy
Come on-a my house, my house
I’m gonna give you everything